It has now been a year since the beginning of the Covid-19 pandemic happened and everyone’s life changed. A lot of people lost jobs, loved ones, jobs and only god knows what else. The Covid-19 Pandemic has dramatically changed my life in positive and negative ways over the past year. Thankfully, through all the struggles I was still able to take care of all my responsibilities, graduate high school and complete my first year of college. Because of the pandemic, I was forced to stay home, attend school online and since everything closed down I wasn’t able to go out and just take my regular little breaks from stressful things.
Me being stuck at home all day caused me to worry. I am a very bad overthinker and tend to get into my own head a lot. I was constantly worried about what was happening in the world and where meals were coming from, how I was getting my sister to school, how was my brother getting lunch money, taking off work to get things done. Anything there was to worry about, I did. It caused me to be really stressed out. I started slacking and losing a lot of motivation which made it harder for me to handle my responsibilities. I couldn’t really reach out to any one or do any of the things that were stress relievers for me. I was just stuck home, stuck in the same routine, stuck in my head. This eventually got in the way of school, highschool AND college.
Going to school from home made me feel isolated from my friends. On top of issues the pandemic caused, I have other health issues so I had to be on lockdown way more than the people around me. And all though I missed my friends and going out, I was glad I didn’t have to worry about all the little petty highschool issues. Who liked who, who wanted to hang out with who, all the stupid issues. I hated my highschool but love my friends if that makes sense. Besides my 3 main friends, I’m not a very social person. I try to come in contact with the least amount of people I can. But even for someone who doesn’t really talk much, I was way too alone. It’s one thing to just not see people but when you can’t really call or contact them as much because their parents sent them out of state it becomes too much. I felt very alone. To avoid this, I tried different hobbies. I got back into reading, writing little wattpad stories, playing my cello & violin etc. Which worked for a while but eventually I started feeling the same way. Everything slowly began to appear as a nightmare I was not able to wake up from. My job ended up going on furlough and shutting down and I was back to stressing a new set of issues. What used to be, how can I get my sister from school if I work turned into could we even afford to send her. And she’s too young to stay home alone. I had to worry about how long my final check can last us until I find another job. ( Thank god for PUA). However, once this happened more family started coming around and it was good to have my family beside me. My family helped as much as they can but with the rising prices, declining markets, and cost of living rising it’s almost impossible to be on top of everything. Slowly, I got very depressed but was still pushing through.